Have you ever wished for eyes in the back of your head? Well, meet Argus Panoptes from Greece and King Indra from India—two legendary figures who took the "all-seeing" thing way too seriously!
Greek mythology : Argus the Overworked Owl-Guardian
In ancient Greece, there lived a giant named Argus Panoptes, whose résumé read: "Professional Stare Master." Hera, the queen of the gods, hired him because he had 100 eyes—and someone had to guard Zeus’s secret crush, Io (who’d been turned into a heifer). Argus took his job very seriously:
He never blinked. Like, ever. With eyes on his hands, knees, and even his toenails, he could spot a fly sneezing from three mountains away 1.
Bedtime? Nope! While half his eyes napped, the other half stayed on duty. (Imagine brushing 50 sets of teeth every night!)
Hobbies included: Counting sheep (with all 100 eyes), winning staring contests against statues, and making security cameras feel insecure.
One day, the trickster god Hermes showed up disguised as a shepherd. He played such a boring lullaby on his flute that 99 of Argus’s eyes dozed off. But one stubborn eye stayed open! Quick-thinking Hermes chucked a rock (or waved a magic wand—myths can’t agree) and finally put that last eyeball to sleep. Hera, feeling guilty, rewarded Argus by sticking his peepers on a peacock’s tail. Now he’s forever fabulous—and still watching you swipe fries at the zoo 1.
Moral of the story: Even all-seeing giants need nap time.
Hindu Mythology : Indra the Eyeball Emperor
Meanwhile, in ancient India, the thunderbolt-wielding god Indra faced an eye-popping crisis. After a little oopsie involving a sage’s wife, a furious curse left him covered in 1,000 eyes! The wife got it worse (1000 vaginas) which was later downgraded to her turning to stone.
Indra :
Getting dressed took 3 hours (buttons are nightmares).
Sneezing sounded like a popcorn explosion.
He cried during sad movies—and flooded entire cities.
Indra’s new eyes made him the ultimate multitasker:
He could watch 1,000 cloud-shows while hurling lightning at demons.
He spotted naughty kids hiding broccoli under napkins across three universes.
But oh, the downsides! Dust storms felt like sandpaper parties. And when he got allergies? Chaos.
One day, during a demon battle, Indra got distracted by a particularly cute squirrel. His 1,000 eyes all zoomed in—“Aww!”—and he accidentally zapped his own throne. The other gods facepalmed. To this day, Hindus say Indra’s eyes twinkle as stars... or maybe they’re just him winking at squirrels.
Moral of the story: More eyes = more problems (and way more tissues).
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